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| i wish: - i could sleep on a consistant basis
- my stomach would stop doing backflips
- i could find a job
- it was friday
- i could move forward
- 10'x12' was the same as 2400 sq ft.
- somewhere over the rainbow was a real place
- i had planned better
- i was independantly wealthy
- apologies came easier
- giradano's made a store in my back yard
- it was spring already
- i had tivo again
- someone handed me an iMac
i'm sure that there are more of them, i just don't know them at the current time. this time of uncertainity is crazy. it's only the generousity of others and their good cheer that have made this season bearable. i would love to go around and punch some people in the face, but if i let this bitterness and anger take hold, it will eat me up for years to come. oh well... i'm sure i'll get there some. dp | | |
| 2. that's it. two. deuce. dos. it's sad that i measure time by youth events and not by actual days (69 if you were using those), but i have 2 events before i'm married. a ski trip and a lock-in. after that my life changes forever. why is that typing this causes my stomach to do somersaults and feel like it's on a carnival ride after a chili dog eating contest. i'm excited, and scared all at the same time. giddy and petrified.
oue ppouy rgasdfhdfg. yep, that about sums it up. it's like rushing headlong into the wind. (i'm not even sure what that exactly means, but i like the phrase)
ok, time to close the door to the rambling and move on. thanks for listening.
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| today i booked my honeymoon. yikes! this is awesome and scary all at the same time.
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| Aurelio's pizza + late evening/night = weird dreams.
that is all.
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| lately i've been imagining life as a roller coaster, where the 17 year old "ride specialist" forgot to latch the seat belt completely before the ride disembarked. and now the mix of fear and excitement abounds because of the uncertainity of whether or not the ride is safe, and how it's going to end up, because there is no safety net. i can softly hear the "click-click-click" of the car ascending the hill in my head.
hang on...
(i don't mean to be cryptic, but i feel overwhelmed. school, work, the future... not one of them is bad, but all of them together is pretty scary.)
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